hauntedbyhorribles

primary document

Dep: Providence 1.42PM (there hasn't been a whole lot of looting)
given that the pure new england air
has grimed my window such
that it's like a Monet out there,
or all the Monets, whizzing
and maybe he put some gray buildings
in there, we don't really know

in here its fifty-five (on the other hand, it was fucking freezing)
i'm leaning on a sack of clean unfolded laundry
listening to white noise (the band)
on my incredible Portable Oudio Device.
someone apparently put out a cigarette
on a wad of discarded gum
placed directly in the center
of the no smoking sign.

i lightly probed my academic future today
(someone on TV said something about going underground)
envisioned life under the tutelage of
polite old women who think radical thoughts
i could recommend a nice tea just down the street
and we'd watch a film about rape

Personal Space Suits, i'll make millions
retire before even having a career (i guess we'd better start digging)
make a beautiful film, docudrama
about a single sea turtle, with
stunning cinematography and
absolute disregard for all other sea turtles
save my lovely chosen one.

i know i'm not very interesting
but like i said, the grime restricts all
focus to the grime itself,
outside is all smudge blur impossible horizon
and the train's got this tilt to it
that won't let me think let alone...

fuck.

well.. what have i got...
the fountain of dirt,
higher test scores guaranteed,
long straight hair right in front of me,
smells like cinnamon and orange peels
(re: that smell--direct thievery,
  junior high, young adult section, either
R.L. Stein or Christopher Pike
now come to live [fr yr entrtnmnt] Thank You very much)
----my whole life in those brackets--
----not alone on this one,------------
----can't forget how to think,--------
---------we never learned how------

BOstoN!?!
i'm crawling up your leg, to the thorax
r.w. emerson on a frisbee keeps pace, shouting
"This disc is merely one circle upon which
I ride beside you; I lived one all around you.
Trace the circumference and begin building
your own." No thanks, I nod, I am hungry
but I just ate lunch with my mother.

 

DINGLEBERRY NUMBER THREE:
I want to sit next to her on the train and hold her hand and whisper in her ear "my ancestors tried as hard as they could to annihilate your ancestors. you shouldn't even be here right now."

DINGLEBERRY NUMBER FOUR:
i can only think in the dark. all my thoughts run away as soon as i turn the lights on.

DINGLEBERRY NUMBER FIVE:
if i could only... laminate... my entire body. think of it--my durability would increase threefold!

a boy and a girl
lying on their backs
in the middle of the room
barechested, both.
they stare through
the creaking ceiling,
inhale, exhale
fingers lightly touching.

how did we get here?
years of tortured passion,
or a week?
did you take off my shirt
or did I do it myself?
you've got an ant on your arm
don't move, i'll get that eyelash
pop that zit, scratch my back.

a smile blocks the entrance
to the most mysterious of holes

I want you
to be
for me
what I can only see in dreams
that is--a lie
constructed in my mind
at night, forever.

DINGLEBERRY #0001:
punctuation is like clothing sometimes you
just feel better without it.

DINGLEBERRY #)))2:
paralyzed reminders of reality, weeping

"it was just like that video game,
i played, i lost,
i can no longer walk."

mission accomplished

INFORMATIONAL QUEEF:
GIVE ME BACK MY SPACES BLOGGER YOU CAN'T JUST EVAPORATE THEM AWAY AFTER PRETENDING IN THE PREVIEW SCREEN THAT YOU HAVE GIVEN THEM AND FORCING ME TO USE THIS RETARDED 'BLOCKQUOTE' THING AS THE ONLY SOMEWHAT EFFECTIVE WAY OF ATTEMPTING TO ESTABLISH RHYTHM IN A POEM, BLOGGER! DON'T YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT POETRY, BLOGGER! YOU HAVE FAILED ME MIGHTILY, BLOGGER. I WEEP, PRETENTIOUSLY, FOR ALL HUMANITY. FAREWELL.

life is portable now,
mobile functionary said.
we take along traces everywhere
a beep, a voice, a song

writing is so fucking medieval
you're like a barbarian with that pen
you savage why dont you get with
the times and be more productive
youre free to do whatever
youd just better be doing something
fucking anything just dont SIT there
fucking MOVE fucking shitless dickbrain
i could fucking KILL you right now
just a fucking lump there
motionless what are you WAITING for
a fucking cattleprod you dont even
PRETEND to jerk off like a filthy
pervert on My COUCH you fucking
WEIRD fucking FREAK FUCK NO!
I DONT WANT TO SEE YOUR THING
thats GROSS fucking PUT IT AWAY
you sick fuck i cant STAND it when
you DO shit like that and
dont lick me either gross.

im getting a sandwich.